The Wisdom of Green Tara, Feminine Bias, and the Illusion of Sex and Gender

Green Tara is a female Buddha. She is said to have incarnated as a king’s daughter and showed such devotion and compassion. She impressed a group of monks so much that they told her they would pray for her to be reborn a man, so she could reach enlightenment!

She told them that there’s no such thing as male and female. That the ideas, projections, and expectations that we have for those in male and female form are not real.

Rolling her eyes, at least internally, I’m sure, Tara vowed then and there, before all the monks, that she would remain a female Buddha for all lifetimes until all beings were liberated from the illusion that a person’s sex determines their ability to become enlightened.

So, let’s take stock. How far have has society come regarding the expectations of what it means to be a “man” or “woman” in the early 21st century and especially having a bias against the feminine?

From where I sit, society is moving toward accepting that the outside form doesn’t have to match the person’s inner masculine or feminine nature. However, monks’ assumption Green Tara’s story continues to limit people today, both the thinking and especially the people who are judged based on their sex and/or gender. After all, everyone has a unique blend of masculine and feminine qualities.

 Still, many people have not realized that “you can’t judge a book by its cover”. The form that a person takes – their outside appearance – is not an absolute reflection of their inner qualities or energy. Insisting that people act and think according to their bodies – their outward appearance -- is a reflection of a limited mindset.

But things are changing.

Now, the qualities associated with a masculine archetype tend toward assertiveness and a focus on tasks, for example. And the qualities of the feminine archetype include a focus on relationships and being “democratic” or inclusive.

However, the archetypes are merely energetic patterns of commonly recognized qualities. Archetypes are not concrete forms, like a person’s biology. And the visual of a person's body or appearance is very influential. If you think that a biological woman must be accommodating and emotional, so her form matches her qualities, while likewise a biological man should be self-confident and aggressive … if you are bothered by effeminate men and put off by assertive women …, then you are like the monks who couldn’t see past Green Tara’s outer form.

These perceived differences between men and women play into something called, “role congruity,” which is the expectation that a person will act feminine or masculine in accordance with their gender (female or male) and their sex (woman or man).

A Long History of Valuing the Masculine Over the Feminine Has Left Its Mark

For thousands of years, Western society has reinforced the notion that good leaders are men with masculine qualities. When someone is not a masculine man or is a woman, people can have doubts about their leadership abilities, regardless of their actual effectiveness as a leader.

In other words, a man and a woman can behave in the same way, but if they both act assertively, the woman will be rated less effective because we expect the man to be assertive in alignment with the masculine archetype, but we don’t expect it of the woman.

Additionally, research shows that in a research situation, where men and women – all who had capable leadership abilities - came together without knowing one another ….

• at first, the men were judged or assumed to be more effective leaders over the women. This showed that accomplished men and women can get the same results in real life, but be perceived at first glance as more or less; effective based only on their sex or gender when you don’t know them.

• however, after the group had more time to interact with each other, the difference in perception of men’s versus women’s leadership capability decreased.

Thus, in our society, you still have to work with a woman over time before you begin to respect her as a leader. But as a female, it’s extremely frustrating to be subjected to these kinds of limiting expectations before others really get to know you, while men get the benefit of the doubt.

A Growing Respect for the Feminine Archetype

Thankfully, we’re seeing a shift in attitudes away from the overemphasis on all things masculine as the way to be successful in business. A growing respect for feminine qualities is moving society away from the matchy-matchy fixed mindset, even in the workplace. Today there is a growing understanding that there are feminine qualities that are useful and even powerful for business success.

For example, businesses are recognizing the need to create team environments of psychological safety that encourage people to speak up without fear of retaliation or being ostracized for their views. The leadership qualities that encourage psychological safety tend toward using the feminine qualities of empathy, inclusivity, and vulnerability.

Also, more businesses encourage collaboration, another feminine quality, amongst employees and teams, to create the best products and services through the use of  cross-functional teams or brainstorming sessions to bring diverse perspectives to solve a problem.

So, even business is recognizing the need for both masculine and feminine qualities for greater success. And that should be a sign that feminine is not “less than” and encouraging people to be less judgmental about the kinds of qualities that people have regardless of their sex or gender.

It’s what’s inside that counts. And each person should be given a chance to express themselves without being confined by their outward form. Neither men nor women should be expected to show up with just the archetypal qualities that align with their bodies.

Green Tara may still have work to do to liberate humans from the illusion that a person’s sex determines their value or ability to become enlightened, but people around the world – even in business -- are starting to understand that the outer appearance of a person isn’t what counts.